This was written in loving memory of Jamie Senior 12-4-12.  

You will forever be adored, loved and missed.

Wishing to fly
This painful grasp holds me tight
I'm chained to this spot, the same spot
never changing or growing - though I keep fighting
Now I'm sinking down into my soul until there's nothing left
I hit the floor and the only place left to look is up, how did I get here?

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I'm the one you really want, but you just can't see it
I tried and tried to make you understand - won't believe it
It's a shame...
You missing out on a good thing,
It's a shame...
You can't see a damn thing.
What you so scared of me for?
I'm just a woman
Maybe I got it all together like you think maybe I do!
'Cause yo I'm fresh and cool!

I can fend on my own, I'm magnificent
I'm a Queen on my throne, I'm magnificent
I'm the magnificent (Say what? Say what?)
I'm the magnificent

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To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself. ~Thich Nhat Hanh

We often hear that "beauty lies in the eye of the beholder" and to me that means when you fail to see the beauty in something, you don't change what you're looking at, you change your perception of what you're looking at. Today I am making the conscience decision to change the way that I see myself.

Sometimes I have to step back, observe and remind myself of all that makes me great emotionally, spiritually, and physically. It's easy to become your worst critic but it's hard to become your biggest fan.

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Can someone tell me...what's the big deal with turning 30?

Don't get me wrong - I understand better than anyone about the cliche and the pressure of what's expected from turning 30. It's all about the stable life which contains all of the glitter that little girls dream of. The age where you either already have, or have at least secured, the potential partner that will turn into the one and who will put that ideal rock on your finger as you skip happily down the isle in white. The cloud 9 life with a bun in the oven and the picture perfect house, with or without a picket fence, but definitely with a kid friendly yard. This followed by the devoted and doting husband who can't get enough of you and his kids. The couple that all other couples envy and who never argue or fight. Where did this cliche come from?

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